[the baker in me - pt 2...]

Preface:  I must preface this post by saying two things.  1).  There are no pictures in this post.  Blogging crime.  You could go check out pinterest or google images if you need pictures though - I even linked you in and got you started.  Kind.  2).  This post has been sitting waiting to be published for a couple of months.  I'm a bit 'off' blogging at the moment but last night my friend told me she enjoyed my writing and she liked part one of this story so this is for her.  Her blog is here - she is amazing and you'd be privileged to nerd it up with her playing board games every Tuesday like me.  End (way too long) preface.



Dear future baker (ha and ha),

Back by popular demand (read: no one asked), part two of the great baking saga of my life.  Part one  left us with a completely eaten but not exactly... shall we say... appreciated pancake cake, made by yours truly.

I had a break from baking for, uh six months or so and then I ventured gently back into the kitchen with Paisley-Jades Coconut Iced Chocolate Slice (no bake) (amazing - you should totally give it a go.)  I very bravely took my slice to work, put it on the table and added a super welcoming sign saying 'Help yourselves!' It was a night shift, and it goes without saying that night shift equals eating fest.  The classic four am sugar low means I've seen nurses eat five day old brownie, mandarins, chip crumbs - whatever is on offer.

No one ate a single piece.

No. One.

I actually laughed out loud when I went in to check on my progress.
Five times.

So morning comes and slice goes back home with me.

Boooooo.

Anyway, don't feel sorry for me because here comes the lesson.  There's always a lesson.  Is there?  I don't know but that's what they say on fancy-pants blogs.  Anyway, this time there was a happy ending.

So I'm tired out of my head after the night duty and waiting at the bus stop for my bus, there is some kind of altercation taking place.  A tall man on crutches is asking a male nurse for a smoke.  Male nurse is refusing, tall is arguing - so on and so forth.  Male nurse is edging away, tall guy comes over to where I'm sitting.  His question to me is whether it is fair that male nurse refuses him a smoke.  I say that I agree with male nurse - he doesn't have a right to someone elses smokes. I say that people work hard for their money, and it isn't fair to expect someone to give you something they've worked hard for.  

See?  Lessons.  I am so a fancy-pants blogger.

Tall guy asks me for a smoke - I tell him I don't smoke and in fact I think it's gross and bad for you.  But I can give him some of my slice?  (See, it does tie in - I'm not just rambling!)  I tell him it's not great for you either but better than cigarettes and that I would be happy to offer him some, even though I worked hard for my money.  I had a paper towel in the container (for my work colleagues to use for their slice - sob) so I gave him a few pieces.

Tall guy was so happy!  He seemed to forget all about his smoke issue, which wasn't surprising given his next issue was that he had no money for the bus.  Awkward.  So bus driver lets him on anyway, and Tall Guy follows me to the back of the bus.  We sit together, merrily chatting about life, love and all things cake.

By the way, male nurse has completely abandoned me  into the loving arms of Tall Guy - even though I'm pretty sure I saved his life.  (Murse was going do-wn!)   Lesson #2 - don't expect anything in return for saving lives with cake.

Suddenly, my new friend TG (we're now on a nick-name basis you see) has a revelation.  He's realised that by giving him the cake, I stopped him from smoking.  He believes that while good for his lungs but not great for his hips, this cake means that he caught the bus which he would otherwise have missed because he'd have been smoking.  Also, the driver who would have been driving the next bus may not have been so kind as to let him on.  And what would he have done if the driver had declined him?  He'd have asked more and more people for more and more smokes and been more and more unhealthy and also still not been HOME.


Me and TG had revelations that day - his was that cake is better than cigarettes both physically, and metaphorically.

Mine was that things are not always as they seem.  Sometimes a tall man on crutches needs your cake more than twenty nurses at four a.m.

Metaphorically speaking, that is.

Learn that.
Love, never-judge-a-tall-book-by-its-angry-cover-me.

[the baker in me... part one]

Dear future baker (ha),

Part one of this story is a little sad, and a little silly.  

I like part two best, but you gotta have the horse before the cart.

Write that down.  That one's for free.

I don't know in which scenario my life would depend on me baking an edible cake, but if there were one - I'd be a goner (gonner?)  In the absence of appropriate real-blogger-and-mother-baker gel colours for a rainbow cake last year (they were delivered late!) I baked Jamie Oliver's pancake cake for a last minute birthday cake for my pal.  It was average at best, kind of stodgy and plain.

Anyway, we ate a slice each and I took the rest to work the next day for my work mates.  Under usual circumstances, nothing goes uneaten in the healthcare profession...  I've seen some pretty dire things be eaten.  Lets just say - rubbish bin raids have been known to occur.

So my beloved (mediocre) pancake cake arrives at work and sits proudly in the fridge with a sign on saying 'pancake cake, eat me!'  I felt sure a free pancake cake would be a welcome treat for my colleagues - I didn't put my name on it so that I sit back could be quietly chuffed with my (very ordinary) efforts.  Regardless of a few tweaks I'd make, it's a pretty interesting concept.  

Also, its free.  Free.

You see the stodginess?  I'd recommend some kind of berry aspect would make it better - a jam or a coulis in the layering.  I can't bake but I sure can eat.

Fast forward to lunch time, and I'm sitting in the back of the staff room waiting for my secret praise.  Imagine my surprise then, to hear...  lets just say...  a very stern and negative appraisal of my work.  There was a lot of 'don't waste your calories' and 'all it is, is nutella and pancakes'.  There was also a very long discussion about all the different aspects of this cake (also of how it isn't even a cake) and all the ways it could be improved.

Don't feel sad for me.  I wasn't sad, I was just bemused really - I'm okay with my weaknesses - though I'd have liked to be able to defend myself.  I'd have said two things.

1). It's Jamie Oliver.  (Instant win).

2).  Also uh, it's free.  I repeat - FREE.

Needless to say, the whole thing was eaten within an hour and people who knew it was me complimented me.  I'm not bothered, in fact I think it says more about the people talking that way - potentially in front of the 'owner' - than it does about me as a person.  But that's a whole 'nother post.

I didn't, however rush to bake again - one failure too many in the baking department for me.  I've been put on probation by My Guy now - to ensure success (and forward moving progress), I should bake only with supervision or not at all.

So funny.

Recently I ventured into the kitchen again to make some of Paisley Jade's special Coconut Iced Chocolate Slice (no bake).  Unsupervised.

And I took it to work and shared it.

So grab a piece of pancake cake and impatiently await part two for the disastrous, life lesson learning results and also a success story.

Love, still no floopin' baker me.  xx  

[old me...]

Dear future me,

The adventures in England are over.

The Shard - I drive past here on the bus on my way to and from work.

Don't worry, I'm not sad about it.  Good things end so that new things can begin and I'm okay with that.  Cos I love new things, and the new things we've got planned are uber good.

We are going home in June after a wee road trip in Europe and a stop over in Singapore.  A little farewell to our travelling ways.  I don't know if you ever let travelling out of your heart once it's been in, but I suppose you must move past it.

Out the window, heading to Ireland.

  

There's a weirdness about going back to our home town where we grew up.  We haven't lived there for almost five years by the time we get home.  

Its just that I feel like 'past me' lives there and I don't care to meet her again.  She uuuugly.  I assume everybody has a 'past-self' who they don't care to remember, and I've decided to think of her as some kind of a bridge to my present self - who I quite like.  She taught me things I wouldn't have otherwise known, helped me shed things I'd have otherwise hung on to.

From one of our local pubs - over the Thames River.

Something I'm learning - you gotta forgive your past self, and trust that she made the decisions she made based on what she knew then - not on what you know now.  She made the best choices she could with the information she had.

Now here's hoping no one else remembers past me either! 

*bites nails nervously*

Love you, and be easy on yourself future me...  xx

[autumn bucket list...]

The lovely ladies over at 'A Beautiful Mess' posed a challenge this week - four simple goals to achieve before 2013.  Funnily enough, I'd been thinking about just this anyway, in an attempt to get hyper organised (the space I seem to need to be in lately in order to have a clear mind!)

(Image from 'A Beautiful Mess' with permission)

I often think about where I would like my life to be in one year, five years, ten years.  I find it motivating to think of how I would feel in five years if I was the same person, doing the same things, having the same issues.  I need to have grown and developed into something I want to be, and not have regrets for the way I wish things would have gone.  I guess that a certain amount of growth happens just in everyday life.  I like to be aware of myself, and my desires and dreams and my shortcomings and to hold the person I know I can be in high regard, and strive to do better for her sake.

So without further ado (and bleating on about sentimental nonsense), here are my four simple goals before 2013, (inspired by the person I aspire to be in 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016 and on and on.)

1).  Complete a craft project.  I am good at starting craft projects, not so good at finishing them (as in, I am terrible).  I don't like this about myself - my inability to stick to something (exercise, diets, projects) and so I thought this would be a good one to focus on.  I have already started something in anticipation, and here's a clue - it ties in with one of the goals from my 29 before 30 bucket list!

2).  Become fitter.  For years now, I've had the goal of losing weight and as I said in number one, I never stick to it.  I just never do it long enough to make a difference.  So maybe 'become fitter' is a better goal.  I've been doing a lot more walking since living in England (incidental exercise) and I am certainly fitter now than I have been.  I've been riding a bike home from work, and am keen to do some zumba and pilates classes.  I guess if I get fitter, drink more water, eat more greens... the weight loss will happen too, but that won't be my main focus.

3).  Make pasta from scratch.  I love Jamie Oliver and his simple approach to food.  When I visit the markets around here, I'm always inspired to eat organic, fresh, homemade food, and then I get home and it all seems too hard.  I think if I learn to make fresh food in an enjoyable (and not too complex way), I would be more inclined to spend time in the kitchen making healthy, delicious food.  So I'm going to make pasta from scratch - I'm thinking I'd like to try ravioli!

4).  Nurture uplifting relationships.  I'd like to be deliberate about the friends I choose to let right into the inner circle of my life, and to nurture the relationships I have that I want to hang on to for good.  I think those are the ones that uplift and add to my life, and I'd like to be a person who uplifts and adds to theirs too.  I'm talking about remembering birthdays, skyping more, sending gifts, words of encouragement.  Not just friendships too, but family relationships and even my marriage.  I guess what I'm saying is it's easy to get blase about relationships that have been around for an age, and it's important to me right now to be deliberate about them.

So all of my goals seem to be less simple than I had intended when I write them out in such a way.  I suppose they are really as simple as making some pasta and going to a zumba class, but they mean more to my personal growth than just the tasks.

Look forward to sharing my journey with you!

[technology...]

Dear future techological me,

I know it may seem 'olden days' to you, but smart phones are currently the 'in thing'.  We don't have communication devices implanted in our brains yet so we have to make do with carrying something around.  

And this week, mine broke.

The only picture I have of technology.  We love it, but we don't photograph it.  Weird.

I never realised how much I used it (or maybe I was in denial) until I didn't have one anymore.  My battery went funny (so technical) and the phone wouldn't charge.  I had to use my housemates old little phone - it has a black and white screen and doesn't even take photos...  I had no contacts, no way of finding out how many calories in an all day breakfast panini, no way to tell how long my bus would be, or whether the tube was even running.  What a saddo.

Don't get me wrong - I wouldn't be without a smart phone now - I don't know how people do it without them.  Paper maps?  Books?  Asking for directions?  Fooey.

What a sad and tragic life I live, when all my comings and goings, my communication with friends and family are all entwined into a rectangular device which holds my life in the palm of its... well, whatever they have instead of hands... gigabytes?  For that one day I actually felt lost.  I didn't know what to do with my hands.  I brought a magazine so I would have something to do on the bus on my way home.

So future technological me, when they try to implant something into your brain, remember this lesson. Life is still for living.  Technology is meant to help us make our lives easier and free-er, not live it for us.  Put down your phone (or power off your in-brain communication device) and have a sit down dinner with your family.  Use a paper map.  Listen to the radio.  Read a real book.  Smile at a stranger.  Be present.  

Love, awkard limbs when something isn't in my hand me.

massagey goodness...

You may remember a post I wrote which is a list of things I want to do before I am 30 (which is in around two years). Well, I have completed my first task, and it was super easy!

# 28) Have a full body massage.

Well I was given some money for my birthday for this very purpose, so I decided to spend it on massages for M and I, and had a super lovely (and very good!) lady come to our house and do them in the comfort of our own home.

No pictures were taken during the massage for fear you would never read my blog again.  After the massages, My Guy and I had a delicious dinner and watched a movie together in bed. What a relaxing Saturday night!

One down, 28 more to go!!


* Originally from www.kendylsplace.com, and unfortunately in the great blog failure of 2012, the pictures got lost...